Have you ever felt overwhelmed? Have you ever felt so anxious that it became difficult to control your thoughts? Or so overly stimulated that you felt trapped and powerless?
Dysregulation, a term used to describe when we are not in control, can impact us on both a behavioural and emotional level. Dysregulation can appear in different ways and can feel differently depending on each unique person. A previous article What's Your Body Telling You?, goes into this further. However, some symptoms of dysregulation can include irritability, depression, anger, anxiety, and increased substance use.
But how can we manage high volumes of distress?
Through the use of distress tolerance skills it is possible to alleviate significant amounts of stress and cope effectively in moments of crisis. However, much like anything we engage with, it is important to adopt the proper mindset. In this, before distress tolerance can begin it is important to understand the importance of radical acceptance. At its core, radical acceptance asks us to change our attitude about a situation by inviting us to acknowledge our current circumstances without judgment or self-criticism. Instead, radical acceptance allows us to recognize that our current circumstances are a result of events that started far in the past that we cannot change, which seeks to remove blame, shame, and anger.
Once we have adopted the right mindset, we can begin to use distress tolerance skills to help us cope. The type of distress tolerance skills that is employed is highly dependent on the situation and what each individual person finds to be effective for them. I invite you to read the list of healthy distress tolerance skills below. If you find a skill that you believe will benefit you in times of distress, write it down in a note to act as a gentle reminder that you have something to come back to in times of uncertainty.
While there are various types of distress tolerance skills, here are a few basic skills that can help in times of emotional difficulty or distress:
Use Distraction
Distraction skills allow us to distract our upsetting thoughts until they have reached a state of neutrality. Some distraction skills consist of:
Be in the Moment
Although it can be very difficult, try your best to focus not on the past or future, but on the present moment using the following methods:
Practice Self-Soothing
Sometimes when we are feeling high levels of stress it can be extremely helpful to focus on our external environment in order to help us feel more safe and in control. Thus, we can use our five senses in as a way to soothe anxiety, panic, uncertainty, or other distressing feelings.
Lastly, if at any time you begin to feel extremely overwhelmed with distress,
depression, or
anxiety, or are having feelings of hurting yourself please consider reaching out to the following crisis resources:
Let us know in the comments which distress tolerance skills you found to be helpful!
Written By: Natalie DeRose, M. Psy. Candidate, B.A. (Hons)
Edited/Reviewed by: Chantal Legere, M. Psy. Candidate, B.A. (Hons)
References
Bray, S. (2013, January 17). Distress Tolerance in Dialectical Behavior Therapy. In Good Therapy . Retrieved from https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/distress-tolerance-dialectical-behavior-therapy-0117134
Mckay, M., Wood, J. C., Brantley, J., & Marra, T. (2007). The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook: Practical Dbt Exercises for Learning Mindfulness, Interpersonal Effectiveness, Emotion Regulation, & Distress Tolerance (pp. 10-29). N.p.: New Harbinger Publications.
Roberts, E. (2017, October 23). How to IMPROVE the Moment – Using DBT Skills to Manage Challenging Situations. Retrieved from
https://www.hartsteinpsychological.com/how-to-improve-the-moment
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